By JoAn Mann, MBA – GPHR, President and Founder – PREP Profile Systems, Inc.

When economic markets and financial institutions lose their foundational strength, and global financial uncertainty tops the priority lists for both individuals and businesses, most people experience increased stress and a heightened sense of confusion.   In this sort of climate, economic depression can set in fast, bringing with it one of the greatest personal and community threats:  poorly thought-through, emotionally-based decisions that can destroy organizations, relationships and individuals.  More than ever, we need to support one another and keep our focus on our relationships. 

If we can hang onto a respectful sense of humor, both individually and as a community, we are putting into place the tools needed to lessen the adverse impact.  There are also some simple, tried and true approaches that don’t cost money.  One is to follow the wisdom of our individual personalities to find some hints for maintaining balance, by communicating in each other’s ‘language’, focusing on positive motivation, especially over the coming weeks and months with loved ones and close colleagues. 

And communication is the key.

The Stages of Change offers us the framework for understanding how to effectively communicate with and coach others (as well as ourselves!) to respond in the most healthy and resilient manner possible.  In general, as individuals move through the change cycle, they will exhibit different behaviors based on their personality traits.  We can trigger pet peeves inadvertently if we are out-of-control ourselves.  So it is even more important during these turbulent times to be sensitive to each other’s level of stress to time or tame our expressions. 

PREP’s Personality People-Talk tip for handling the Change-Crisis Mode:

First, use the Stages of Change (below) to understand the natural process of Change and Crisis resolution.  If the Stages of Change diagram looks familiar to you, it is! This cycle is very similar to the grief cycle—being human makes us all prone to the physiologic-organic body cycles in adapting to change.  If possible, try to see the situation from the lens of the person who impacts you, as well as how you impact that person. 

PeopleTalk™ TIPS for Understanding “Change” on Natural Personality Styles
The following brief descriptions of the four classic personalities, and the “adaptive” style that fits into the middle ground, in their Neutral, Strengths mode and their initial reaction when put Under Stress due to change.  For a specific example, (Outgoing Trait experiencing the Stock Crisis) please see the end of this blog.

Controlling Trait – Neutral, Strengths: Known for their natural self confidence. Under Stress:  they look like they know what they are talking about… always and even when they don’t, to avoid looking incompetent; their taking charge is often appreciated, but their ‘heavy hand’ may not be…

Outgoing Trait – Neutral, Strengths: Known for their light-hearted, friendly fun-loving approach to life. Under Stress:  they can appear to laugh off even the most serious of events … even if they know it is ruinous, so others don’t know if they really ‘don’t get it’ or if they are trying to lighten things up…either way, they may not be seen as credible.

Relaxed Trait – Neutral, Strengths: Known for their calm, listening and understanding presence. Under Stress: they look calm and even aloof during a crisis … even when they internally feel upset and there is chaos all about them, which can mislead others to think they don’t care.

Exacting Trait – Neutral, Strengths: Known for their natural ability to organize mass confusion, excel in detail work and correct mistakes. Under Stress: they appear to know what is right for the situation and others, and will criticize unfair actions as ‘wrong’, even if it culturally is a mismatch.

Adaptive Styles – Neutral, Strengths: Known for their flexible nature and ability to read signs of change to blend in. Under Stress:  they will keep their options open and not offer their opinion until after a decision is made;  since their ideas are often good, the wasted time is annoying and opportunity windows may be missed.

Second, consider what could be communicated that would make a positive difference to this person. 

PeopleTalk™ TIPS for Motivating Positive Communications

Note:  Self-talk: “…“ refers to their natural self-talk/perspective.  (Need to satisfy their native or natural position before you have their attention to continue on with other aspects of the communication)

Controlling Trait - Outcome first.  Rationale second.  Self-talk: “I think”

Outgoing Trait - Empathy first. Logic second.  Self-talk: “Others feel”

Relaxed Trait - Rationale first.  Empathy second.  Plan of Action third.  Self-talk: “I feel” Note:  They need more digestion time in a crisis to re-balance themselves.

Exacting Trait - Logic first.  Rationale second.  Self-talk: “Others think”

Adaptive Styles - Options first.  Plan of Action second. Self-talk: “What are my alternatives?”

In summary, the more connected and deeply appreciated an individual feels, the more uncertainty he or she will probably tolerate.  Simple communications that match the person’s positive intensity, but gradually shift the personality trait’s awareness to a more balanced perspective can make a big difference in our own lives, our loved ones and colleagues.

Connecting to greater meaning, balance and purpose is one antidote to traumatic times--whether financial, political or even when ones health and loved ones are in danger.  By speaking the deeper language of the personality, each of us can contribute to a more respectful way of living, releasing the demons of the unknown to greater creativity, hope and eventual resolutions of the problems of the day.

Example: OUTGOING  person experiencing Stages of Change: Stock Market Crash

We’re going to view the Stages of a Change-Crisis through the eyes of an Outgoing individual since they often contact a wide and engaged social network that influences far more than the classic one person to ten ratio.  Further, they can be a bit dramatic and unwittingly fuel the fires of global emotional over-reactions in others.  Of all styles perhaps this trait most influentially intensifies rampant fear or hope…

PeopleTalk™ TIP for Communicating with OUTGOING Styles! 

Stage 1      Surprise/Shock (first of the 8-day stock market crash)

“Oh my ___! Mary!  John!  Sally!  Steve!  Everybody look!  Oh my ____!  This is terrible!  Have you heard???? Cindy! Shelby!  Jennifer!  Austin!  Tim!  Ed!  Barb! Mark!”

RESPONSE: “Oh, my, thank you for your email!  I checked it out and it is awful.  I’m reading/listening to (the most neutral news source/website you know of, PBS or Snopes.com!) Check it out—let me know what you think!”

OUTGOING types need validation and to hear feedback, so they can process out-loud and preferably with someone.  They are usually not quiet at this stage and don’t like being alone in distressful times.  When you can match them with some intensity, they hear you better than if you tell them to ‘simmer down, get over it, don’t make a scene’.  If you need quiet alone time, encourage them to get together with ___ (his or her best friend/s) – you have some ‘business’ to attend to… and taking care of yourself with private time is as important for introspective folks as commiserating with friends is for OUTGOING types.

Stage 2       Denial (second day of the stock market crash)

“Oh, this can’t happen, why my broker assured me this was a great fund and my bank accounts are FDIC insured!  She would never say anything but the truth and she has all the certificates to prove she knows what she’s talking about!  Carol!  Mary!  Ken!  Chris!  Alex!”

RESPONSE:  “Don’t be too hard on yourself or too sure—everyone makes mistakes and, well, sometimes the unpredictable is pretty unknown.  I wonder what might make sense if we think about a year from now.”

Help the OUTGOING person who can be a bit insecure, overly reliant on credentials, rather than their gut-level opinions, by  creating a bigger picture perspective.  This will help them stay focused on others, which they tend to naturally do, but from a thinking perspective… a singular move from the feeling perspective, rather than jump-shift move, which would require them to think things through thoroughly in a fast-moving scenario—not the OUTGOING person’s strong suit.  Introspective individuals think things through logically, and are known for their unflappability, which is great in crisis times… not appropriate when passion and joy would be anticipated, say during an amorous evening or celebration… we each have our strengths…and weaknesses.

Stage 3       Sliding into the abyss  (Day 3 of Stock Market Crash) 

“Uh-oh.  Maybe I should have sold when the broker put her house up for sale last spring…… hey anybody else worried out there???  Mary? Jerry?  Jim? Lisa? Amie?  Silence , an unknown commodity for Outgoing types ”

RESPONSE:  “Here we go again – what goes up must come down.  Talk about bad timing.  Guess we’ll have to hang in there together to figure this out when the dust all settles.”

Outgoing types respond well to reassurance and being part of a friendship or relationship, togetherness, when things get bad.  This is not the time to be overly intense or even remotely suggest the worst—they could internalize that more deeply than anyone would think possible from their normally sunny nature. They will usually snap out of emotional negativity when they need to be there for the good of the team/family/group.  If they feel all alone, they can go quickly into a worst-case-imagination that could trigger a situational depression—not something that will do anyone much good.  They can bring down the mood of a group quite quickly if the dark side is all they see; likewise, they can be the beacon of light in a storm when they feel they must be there for others. 

“Noooo to the Bailout!  Give ME a break!!  Somebody listen!  What are they doing in Washington and New York?  Don’t they have a clue? Helpppppp sounds of great cries to anyone still listening”.

RESPONSE:  “No they don’t have a clue.  We can’t give them any more of us or we’ll go down with them;.  Let’s at least focus one hour on something they can’t take away—on ___ ( whatever fun pastime you share with this person—a board game, movie, cooking a dinner together, taking a walk) .

Interestingly, introspective individuals often are more ‘optimistic’ when things are at their worst than OUTGOING types.  This is a situation of our strengths that are over-used become our downfalls; as well as how opposites attract for all sorts of biological reasons, not the least of which is survival, as in this lowest point of handling distressful change.  When the OUTGOING person hears supportive and motivational words in their darkest hours, they may not respond immediately, but in all probability, they are listening and will come around more quickly when there is a ‘togetherness’ activity being the catalyst.  They are probably quieter than usual, which makes them more approachable by introspective types, who then, because they can actually get a word in, will talk more, which creates a supportive environment for the OUTGOING style to get back into balance…and then once again, there goes the peaceful quiet!

“Well, I’m pretty healthy, we’re all in this together, my family is ok, so now I understand what Grandma and Great Grandmother were talking about—maybe we’ll try canning the last of the harvest(some very optimistic comment…)  Mary!  Jan!  Debbie! Bob! Gay!  Who knows how to do canning?  Who can get us cheap apples?  Hey, what about the Mason Jars?  Anybody have some of those?  What about the Good Will Store??  Hey!!!”

RESPONSE:  “Sounds great – I think I’ll take care of my … it’s been a while since I’ve checked in on ___ (whatever it is that you enjoy doing to recharge yourself that you haven’t been doing during the stressful change stages).”

Things are sounding now back more to “normal”.  Introspective individuals sometimes wish OUTGOING types would stay in their quiet Stage 3 and 4 modes…but, then, the world would probably

“Well, it’s not going to happen overnight, but, it seems like, well, maybe things will become healthier in the long run, at least for our kids.  Hey! Jerry!  Sarah!  Tom!  What are you up to? Let’s go help Aunt ….?”

RESPONSE:  “Good point.  Sometimes it is hard to see the forest through the trees.  Guess I’ll … (whatever is the balanced and appropriate next activity for you, in relationship with an-overly-active, talkative OUTGOING friend!)

Validating simply and from a mutually understandable metaphor for the whole situation helps the OUTGOING person know they have been involved with some action that is making a valuable contribution to their world/community. While OUTGOING types love being the motivator/cheering section, it is most rewarding for OUTGOING Styles to know their mental attitude and reasoning are recognized by others—especially those more introspective and typically logical than they are. Gentle communication to remind them to ground themselves, so to not drop off the abyss by over-doing their empathetic, emotional strengths in the end reinforces a complementary relationship between OUTGOING and introspective people. 

By JoAn A Mann, MBA, GPHR – President and Founder, PREP Profile Systems, Inc.

PREP Profile Systems was founded in 1984 with a mission to transform the global workplace by increasing understanding and trust and to improve personal communications, motivation, and organizational productivity.  PREP’s 5-minute personality survey was developed by JoAn Mann and Dr. Robert (Samuel) Houston in 1984 is one of the premier assessments for non-biased, cross-cultural personality assessment.  The PREP reports are now globally used by individuals and organizations for rapid insight into relationships, career matching, hiring, assessing individual stress levels, leadership, teamwork, and coaching.